I’m almost 36 years old and I still live with my parents.
Let’s let that sink in for a bit…
Yet it is considered to be perfectly normal from the Asian standard way of living. It is the new normal that I have accepted.
I first ‘officially’ moved back into my parents’ place following my separation from my then husband. Against all odds, I decided to move out. The lawyer I met was furious about it and called me stupid – I din’t hire her!
But I am so thankful for my parents. Who took my son and me back in a heartbeat without any judgment. If my separation were to happen back when I was still living in the US, things might be so different. In America, I have no relatives nor many friends where I used to lived.
My family was my safety net that allowed me to fell freely when my whole world came tumbling down.
I rebuilt my life, I moved on and nearly 5 years later I am still here. Living under my parents’ roof. I help cared for my parents when they fell ill along with my brothers. Only one of my two brothers had moved out – just two blocks down the street. My youngest one still lives here too.
There are lots of times where I miss living alone, having a place to call my own. Me, the independent girl who left the nest earlier than my brothers ever did. I was so used to do things my own way and in my own terms. That’s what I miss most about having my own space.
Yet I realized I still have a purpose to be here, to assist my mother and keep her company while my father works many miles away from home. To allow my son to get to know his grandparents and uncles and forming a strong bond that will last a lifetime. Maybe it’s a blessed chance for me to enjoy every second my gorgeous niece whenever she’s in my arms, to kiss her delicious cheeks often and to knit lifelong ties between an aunty and her niece.
As eager as I am for the new chapter of my life to unfold with Dan, I realized I am on a borrowed times at the moment. That thing might and will change for us. People keep asking when we will get married after we announced our engagement and some already asked where we will make a home for ourselves since he is still in Melbourne and I am in Jakarta. Only 3235.99 miles apart from each other!
To the nice friends and people who keep asking, I can only smile and tell you guys that we will reveal everything in due time. We are not rushing to the altar. We are planning to spend the rest of our lives together and in that alone lays a beautiful precious feeling.
So what does one grown up woman do then?
Smile widely and absorb every essence of blessings that still allows her to share her life with the people that she loves oh and takes some photos too!
How is your living arrangement? Do you live close to your family or far apart? Please do share your story.