“It must be hard…”
“I don’t know how you can do it…”
“I could never do that…”
Those are just some of the things people says when they find out I’m in a long-distance relationship. Usually, I just smiled and stop explaining things but maybe this time I could try to elaborate on the big question why?
Why would I be in a relationship where I can’t see and touch the person I love with every day – or every other day for that matter? Why would I sacrifice weekends glued to Skype or Facetime?
Why not is my answer…
Why I Choose Long-Distance Relationship
- When you found someone who recognizes the song in your heart even when you can’t even hear it? That person is worth fighting for.
- The uncomfortable distance actually brought us closer than ever. We traded the long days of terribly missing each other with several precious days where we can really be together and every time it feels like magic. I went to see him again in Melbourne last June and I loved every second we got to spent together and meeting his families.
- Knowing not only we can survive the distance but also all the major events that could easily tear us apart made it all worth while and we have been through a lot in the past 2 years.
- It taught us – well me mostly – how to communicate better which is something I was really struggling with at first. We make sure that we have a heart-to-heart communications at all times. Yes, of course, we have our moments where we both are being completely silly and cheeky but we do try harder to communicate better on a much deeper level.
- Ours is a learning experience on how to become a good listener – and I mean a really good listener to your significant other. Sometimes they just wanted to be heard, to be acknowledged. Distance made it difficult because you cannot just touch their hand and sending them those vibes that everything will be alright.
- You learn to prioritize things and when you are committed then you make time for each other. Luckily, our time differences are not that greatly. Currently, he is 4 hours ahead of Jakarta (hello, summer time!). This can either make us or frustrate us. By the time I got off work, he would be sleeping and so on. Yet we are committed to having “Our Time”…undisturbed times that we dedicated for each other. With our schedules, it can be challenging but we make it work.
- We trade off tears with the comfort of trusting that when someone love you that much and that deeply, they don’t see how long or difficult the road is yet how beautiful the destinations would be like.
- I finally found a man who really helps me feel that even distance is acceptable. Yes, there are moments where it just feels too hard and I cried myself and vented to my girlfriends how difficult it is but my heart and soul have chosen him. Time and time again…I choose to be with him.
- Since we communicate through words instead of physical affections, we often joke that one day we might write a book out of our love emails. His words are always so thoughtful, so kind, so loving even when things are difficult in our lives. He remains steadfast and calm.
- We support each other fully even from afar. He helps me with giving me advises that I would have never even considered otherwise. He even genuinely involves with raising my boy although he has no parenting experience, I always value his opinions and suggestions greatly knowing that they come from love and a sincere place. He has sat down with me in school meetings making me feel less alone and surprised all the teachers.
- He loves me for me. Not for the shape of my body, nor the looks on my face. He actually finds me most beautiful without any makeup on, but he also loves it when I put them on. Go figure! The kinds of love he has for me is the one that I’ve never known existed before. He simply love me for me, the soul I was born with and the woman I was, the woman I currently am and the woman I will become. Genuine love like that doesn’t come easily.
- We express our gratitude openly daily and this is a huge part of what glued us together. We are both aware of how precious this bond that we have and we acknowledge each other. A short email, a funny youtube video…you name it…it’s all in the actions, the gestures that we treasure.
When you have this kind of love, then you choose it every day over and over again. Making conscious decisions to invest in our relationship, to foster quality times whenever we can, to trust that one day when we finally can be together for good, it will be so awesome!
Have you ever been in a long-distance relationship? Would love to hear your story!