The Writer Wannabe Syndrome
How many times did I fail to post something on this blog because I feel like my writing isn’t good enough? I wear the ‘wannabe’ title for so long now. It took that one special person to open my eyes.
“You are a writer!”
“Your voice is your voice and you are unique. No one else have your story.”
“Stop saying you are a writer wannabe, you already are a writer.”
His soft voice opened the eyes of my heart.
It reminds me how I have always been so hard on myself. From my writing down to my body, I was my own worst enemy!
Did you know I’ve been blogging for 9 years now? Yes, 9 long years! Not all of them are recorded here on Scoops of Joy but yeah, it’s been a long time and I know I’ve evolved…I found my writing to be more from the heart lately than it ever was. If I were to read my old blog I would probably be way too embarrassed!
Even when I got reassuring comment like this one or this one from readers, I still have doubts. I still have moments where I questioned my ability to write, to form sentences that can do my thoughts justice. Sometimes when I read other more eloquent pieces written by bloggers I adore, I wish I could string sentences as good as them.
Writing in a language that is not my native tongue, I still make mistakes, grammatical errors and yes sometimes it’s embarrassing, sometimes I got publicly called out on it. I took it hard of course because I wanted to be better than good. My writing has got me through some of the darkest times of my life, it evolve to find the style of writing that suits me, which project who I really am. Finding my voice, my mojo in writing alone has been quite a journey.
Writing has gotten me through a lot of stuffs, cathartic even and my love for writing will always be a big huge part of me.
Writing gives me joy…
Writing makes me happy…
My writing is mine alone to share with you and maybe just maybe it would inspire others.
Therefore, if you look to the top right section of this blog, you will no longer see my old profile where I plastered “Writer wannabe” label in there. From this day on I will write from the heart. I will continue to practice and I will be writing a lot more. Maybe you will see some of them here, maybe you won’t.
When did you realized you are indeed a writer?
I’m linking up with Shell